I have read articles that are titled "10 things not to say to your pastor's wife" or "10 things to do to encourage your pastor's wife", etc. I always enjoy reading them even if I can't completely relate to them. Sometimes they mention mean things that have been said or done to a pastor's wife that I have not had said or done to me.
Sometimes the bad thing about reading these articles is that I start feeling like I am different from any other lady in my church. I learned a new lesson at church this past week. It was like an "ah-ha" moment. First, I sat down before Sunday school started. Hardly anyone was there yet. As the people started coming in, I realized I was sitting at a table of 4 by myself. The other tables were all filling up, but here I was sitting alone. At first, it hit me that I was lonely. I don't get to sit with my husband during Sunday school or church and here I was sitting all alone. Sunday school started and I was still alone. I started feeling sorry for myself, but quickly caught myself and tried making myself focus on the lesson. A little bit after Sunday school started a dad and daughter came in and they sat by me....maybe because it was the closest table with seats or maybe they really wanted to sit there. Whatever the case it didn't really matter...I was not going to let myself feel sorry for myself.
Then after Sunday school I went upstairs for the morning service. I again was sitting by myself except for two of my kids. The other two kids were sitting with other people. I was sitting in the very last row since we have recently started keeping our youngest child in the service. I again started looking around and started feeling sorry for myself because I was feeling lonely. I again quickly started changing my attitude about it. When I looked around again I realized we have many ladies (and a couple men) that are at church alone. Either they are never married, widowed, divorced or their spouse doesn't come to church. I realized I probably wasn't the only one feeling lonely. These ladies (and guys) may be feeling lonely too (or at times do). So, my thoughts started going to "what can I do to help them not feel lonely?".
I also realized I am no one special. I am just like any other Christian woman in this church. Yes, I've known that before, but like I said, this was an "ah-ha" moment. Instead of feeling sorry for myself that no one was reaching out to me, it made me realize I need to be reaching out to these ladies more too. Now there may be expectations that I still put on myself or others may put on me, but I am going to try to remind myself I am no one special in the church, I am just another Christian lady.
But, then what does that mean? Does that mean I just sit back and don't do anything? Of course not! It means I do what God has called me to do. It means I take care of my home, my husband, my kids and I reach out to those around me to encourage them. No, I can't do everything, but I can do what GOD expects me to do, not what others (including myself) expect.
And before anyone corrects me....yes, I AM someone special because I am God's child, but I am no more special than the person next to me that is God's child. And that is why I just have the TITLE pastor's wife.
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